on the you.

You know the very thing at your core that affects your center of gravity in a second's notice? The one that drives you down and moves you forward - that pulls you back and sends you to the clouds? That's what I want to know about you.

This season continues to move me to words. The confession? My yearning for stability and settling is strong. My strengths seem to lie in everything I envisioned for my future-family-self. The truth? Jesus leads elsewhere; He reminds me of Paul's words in 2 Corinthians 12:9 and smiles. Through that smile I hear Him telling me to be courageous and brave in that weakness; because I AM.

Instead, the day to day is nothing but dynamic situations. He has created me to feel deep; He asks me to love hard. More then anything, He brings me beautiful people and all the joyfilled tough stuff that comes with them. In turn I sit with some awesome emotions.

I've learned that He knows my emotions - sees them and has lived them - but asks for boldness beyond them. He lays out reason and has given me truth to stand in instead.

I like that. There is a time for emotions and there is a time for trusting what is unfolding - rooting it deep in truth. This has made me a better version of myself.

I can't generalize these thoughts into take-away or bullet point steps for "How to Be Your Best You."

But I do know it all starts with knowing Jesus.

And often it continues with fellowship, community, and depth in relationships. People who see your raw emotions, recognize them, but know when to tell you to focus on the reasoning and seek the truth.

If you sit with people just like you, you see the same small image of God that you always see. If you put a diverse group of believers together, you often draw closer to the whole picture of God.

It's my daily pursuit to love the woman God has created in & through me - to humbly lay it down at the feet of Jesus. The Lord purposefully molds my small little piece to be shared with the whole.

What I rest in this evening is that with eyes fixed on Jesus, my yesterday does not define who I can be right in this moment.  What I challenge myself for tomorrow is to be moved to my core by the gospel so that I meet others with the same eyes that Jesus has for me. 

*Speaking of weakness: I'm finally trying Pure Barre tonight - I'm stoked. The last time I stepped foot in a dance studio was in kindergarten; they had to order me a "special sized costume..." I hope my awesome flexibility doesn't knock other people over :)

on emotions.

"Emotions moderated by reason and guided by truth 

lead to constructive action."

[Gary Chapman]

lupita nyong'o

Quite a few conversations this week with friends who fear aging, pregnancy, and changes in their physical beauty. Mulling through scripture and asking the Lord for wisdom - if anything is revealed, I'll be sure to share. However, this Oscar winning lady nailed my current perspective.

Start with your heart ladies. Tune it to seek grace, use God's strength, and to share every gift you've been given.  

those fading blues.

January started with three friends on vacation at the Rose Bowl parade and ready for a Spartan victory.

February began with a car full of my cousin and her college friends - excited to spend Saturday night in cozy gray chairs of Riverview.

March rolled in with late night Lansing tunes, icy parking lots, short rest, and 1100+ high school students excited about pursuing health careers and eager to compete for their gold medals (very much like lions).

This month holds thirty one days of work hours and to-do lists - best friend's birthdays and college basketball games. It shouldn't vary far from the other March months I've lived,

but tonight the even sky whispered something different.

The evening orange was not quick to turn to night time blue - it was not eager to leave. It seemed very much like a reminder, asking me to hold today with just as much care as tomorrow.

January's practice was making exercise a priority.
February asked for consistency in prayers.
March holds something undetermined to me - but it feels full and light all at the same time. It feels just like I'm settling into some kind of fruitful rhythm.

Excited to unfold God's provision this month. Grateful to be a part of the gospel's growth and definition of blessings in "loving the unlovable and comforting the sorrowful" (The One Thing Christians Should Stop Saying).

Grateful for depth, for committment, and for God's beautiful ways of revealing His truths.