woke up this morning....

i woke up this morning. ( I know...right!?)
after about 4 alarms. (not typical)
sore quads and one sore right calf. (ouch)
i had to do a little bit of stretching. (duh)

all from a run in the rain. (with puddles!)

Mere and I hit the cement yesterday when it was rainin' cats and dogs outside.
I loved it.
Running reminds me that I am alive, that my heart beats, and that God has given me two legs for a reason. I need to use them, move them, and groove them :]
There have been three instances in my life where I feel like God has told me that running is good, it's something I should be doing, and something that will be of benefit to a healthy heart, soul, and mind. [plus keep me cancer free!...more on that next post]

I need to keep running as long as I possibly can....So in my quest to keep my running life interesting....I'm going to sign up for something.
a couple of 5k's?
maybe a 10k?
half-marathon?

to the left: a 2003 old school picture!

I like running with slow/talkative runners. I prefer it to be competition free. And I don't like feeling like I'm slowing people down.

Fit the criteria (haha)?
You in? Let me know! :]

A good friend is always better then my outdated Cristina Aguilera and Nelly-filled MP3 player.

The Way to Love

Maryclaire Micallef gave me the book, "The Way To Love" by Anthony De Mello, and it has become part of my devotional time each day. Claire warned me that this tiny 5 inches by 3 inch book was loaded with honesty and ideas about "grappling the question of love."

Man was she right. This book is so convicting that there have been days where I can't keep reading because I am still trying to grasp what was spoken to me the day prior.

Two days ago I read about going the extra mile, based off the bible verse:

"And if anyone would sue you and take your coat, let them have your cloak as well; and if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles."

Matthew 5:40-41

He talks about how our family, culture, religion, society, and past experiences program this computer inside of our heads telling us how we should be, what we should want, and how the world should be. This computer operates at every second of every day, demanding that certain standards follow the criteria of it's program. And when the criteria is not met, we experience anxiety, bitterness, anger, tension, etc. In the meantime, we try and change the world around us to meet the demands of our computer, and we are granted a temporary precarious peace. That is, until the next trifle thing happens in our life. (insert correct citation for paraphrasing here, pp.13-18)

So we live at the mercy of our computer, that we didn't even program ourselves...how unfair! And this whacked-up created program prevents us from going the extra mile. This program tells us, "It's all about me me me me" before it says, "Love others, love others."

BUT the cool part is that we can change it. It will take loads of time, lots of "stopping to think" and "thinking before we speak."

It will require me to look at each situation with the eyes of me heart (as God intends) instead of the eyes of my computer.

It's a work in progress :]

Happy gloomy Wednesday!

sticks and stones

May break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

Well that's a little bit of a lie! I've been thinking about why people's words can cut us deep sometimes, why they cause us to be left speechless and dealing with a knot in the pit of our stomach and a ball in our throat.

Do you know what I'm talking about? Someone making a comment, usually nonchalantly, that just cuts you in the wrong way?

I think a lot of the time some people speak with such honesty that they lack the grace - or vice versa. This leads to conflict, hurt feelings, and misunderstandings. For me, most of the comments that hurt the most are the comments that I know are true, but refuse to believe on my own.

So when it is addressed publicly and by another person, my immediate reaction is to blame them for throwing the sticks and stones, when in reality my bone was broken the entire time.

But then there are other times, when the comments are just plain insults from those that you love the most, those are painful. Those comments create a wound that is deep, jagged, and usually struggles to heal.

I don't understand God's plan with those wounds, I don't understand why conversation has the potential to be hurtful, and I really don't like that I'm sure I've caused quite a few wounds in my lifetime as well.

I do understand that God is great, his words are true and honest, and that His intention is never to hurt us but to love us, guide us, help us, and teach us.

He heals the broken.

i so loved today

Today I got to hang out for six-ish hours with some of my friends from Work Crew. We were at Lake Champion way back in June of 2004, so it has been almost four years since we spent a whole month together.

Dana Sherry, one of my great elementary and high school friends was in attendance as well as Selma Nunes and Tony Pyle, both with whom I now share a lot of my college memories with. Then our friend Russ Brasher, from Toledo was able to make the drive to Ann Arbor to see us too!

Now here's the deal. For most of you who know my work crew experience, you will know that I didn't really enjoy it quite as much as the average person does. I was homesick the entire time and wanted to be back in my sheltered unchanging world, where I was cross country captain and on top of the world :] So needless to say, I never spoke highly of my experience except for the fact that it was sweet to get to see another YL camp.

Looking back on the past four years of my life, that month has set me up for an eternity of love. Selma and Tony both have this incredible ability to make me laugh for hours on end...but there is even more to it then that. They challenge me, call me out, tell me how it is, and force me to think outside the box. They have shown me what it means to lead a ministry, what it looks like to sacrifice and persevere. They are just a phenomenal part of my life, especially in the past year.

I got to hang out with Dana for the first time in WAY too long of a time today/tonight too. She is beautiful. I can't believe how long we've been friends, but what really gets me is that we have become completely different women in this world who are united because of a bond that God has eternally tied between us. She teaches me confidence, patience, and calmness...she lives a stress free life and let's God take care of things...it's great.

Russ is great too. I love that he came and I love that he is about to become a bigger part of my life. We didn't really talk much at work crew...and not for any bad reasons...really just because there was no reason for us to associate that much. But because of God, and because He loves us so freakin' much, He brings old acquaintances and makes them into new friends.

I am eternally grateful for work crew. If you ever get the chance to do it, just do it. I'll send you mail :]

Love you all. Thanks for being a part of my walk with Jesus.